After moving 18 times before I turned 18, it seemed a lifelong nomadic pattern was set… My wife got used to it after moving 33 times in 34 years of marriage (many were brief sojourns or short-term apartment leases in our 20s), but now she's waiting for the next move… and I don't feel like it's going to happen any time soon. Mom tells me that Dad settled about the same age as I am now, so… 🤷♂️ It's not even local or familial connections in our current abode—we're two years in one place now and the roots aren't deep yet. Of course, our kids in their 20s are off gallivanting about. Subconscious genetic novelty seeking FTW?
Such a poignant piece, Jane. As someone who lived and worked overseas right after college and then traveled solo around the world for over a year in my early 20's, you touch on a truth: What we yearned to explore, to find our identity, to prove we could accomplish something is no longer needed. As you and those who commented said: priorties change-career, family community and roots are what nourishes me now. The thought of going off to India or Africa on a solo journey doesn't appeal to me anymore. My daughter took a college semester in India and I was thrilled she went to India because of my stories. That kind of travleing is for the young and I would encourage anyone in their 20's to go forth. Good for Cloe! A mother's sob is good; a mother's joy for her young, growing-into-adulthood daughter seeing the world is good as well. Ah, the chapters of life!
I feel this way, too! So conflicted, possibly a bit codependent, but mostly just content with everything I have here at home. And it's super fun to re-live the travels of my youth (living vicariously through my former selves?!) by reading through the journals and looking at the pictures from way back when.
As you know, I have had my own set of adventures during my lifetime, but I too no longer have that strong desire to go exploring for the sake of it. What has changed as I have gotten older is that I now find more fulfillment building and maintaining connections with people I care about. Travel to far off places both familiar and new gives me a bit of a sugar high, but when I come back from these trips abroad I feel empty, not rejuvenated, whereas when I catch up with friends, I feel heartened. It has been a strange and confusing re-arranging of mental priorities that I felt little control over.
My ultimate dream in my twenties was to travel around the US in a shitty van with a bunch of smelly dudes and play the same punk bar at 11pm in every two-horse town. ??????
Now I won’t even venture out for a show that starts at 9. 👵
It's such a strange reality, settling into this life at home, isn't it? Feeling tethered. But happy. But also wanting to get out there in the world again. My daughter is going to Italy fall semester and I'm thrilled for her. Sniff sniff. But very thrilled and proud.
After moving 18 times before I turned 18, it seemed a lifelong nomadic pattern was set… My wife got used to it after moving 33 times in 34 years of marriage (many were brief sojourns or short-term apartment leases in our 20s), but now she's waiting for the next move… and I don't feel like it's going to happen any time soon. Mom tells me that Dad settled about the same age as I am now, so… 🤷♂️ It's not even local or familial connections in our current abode—we're two years in one place now and the roots aren't deep yet. Of course, our kids in their 20s are off gallivanting about. Subconscious genetic novelty seeking FTW?
Such a poignant piece, Jane. As someone who lived and worked overseas right after college and then traveled solo around the world for over a year in my early 20's, you touch on a truth: What we yearned to explore, to find our identity, to prove we could accomplish something is no longer needed. As you and those who commented said: priorties change-career, family community and roots are what nourishes me now. The thought of going off to India or Africa on a solo journey doesn't appeal to me anymore. My daughter took a college semester in India and I was thrilled she went to India because of my stories. That kind of travleing is for the young and I would encourage anyone in their 20's to go forth. Good for Cloe! A mother's sob is good; a mother's joy for her young, growing-into-adulthood daughter seeing the world is good as well. Ah, the chapters of life!
I feel this way, too! So conflicted, possibly a bit codependent, but mostly just content with everything I have here at home. And it's super fun to re-live the travels of my youth (living vicariously through my former selves?!) by reading through the journals and looking at the pictures from way back when.
As you know, I have had my own set of adventures during my lifetime, but I too no longer have that strong desire to go exploring for the sake of it. What has changed as I have gotten older is that I now find more fulfillment building and maintaining connections with people I care about. Travel to far off places both familiar and new gives me a bit of a sugar high, but when I come back from these trips abroad I feel empty, not rejuvenated, whereas when I catch up with friends, I feel heartened. It has been a strange and confusing re-arranging of mental priorities that I felt little control over.
OMG those pictures... LOVE! :-)
My ultimate dream in my twenties was to travel around the US in a shitty van with a bunch of smelly dudes and play the same punk bar at 11pm in every two-horse town. ??????
Now I won’t even venture out for a show that starts at 9. 👵
It's such a strange reality, settling into this life at home, isn't it? Feeling tethered. But happy. But also wanting to get out there in the world again. My daughter is going to Italy fall semester and I'm thrilled for her. Sniff sniff. But very thrilled and proud.